If the bully bullies, who is bullying the bully?
It’s the age old question that provides little comfort to children.
When we’re bullied as a child or adult, we are led to believe that the bullying is a by-product of that person’s own insecurity. But it’s very hard to overcome this and be the bigger person. Often the bully is playing on our own insecurities and more often than not we walk away with our self-esteem dented and a desire for vengeance.
It’s hard enough for us adults to address bullies with empathy, sympathy or pity; let alone to expect children to do the same with their oppressors.
Whenever I was bullied as a child I tended to violently dislike those children who treated me with contempt. I was told these children were probably victims of bullying and had other issues that meant they were taking their frustrations out on me. This didn’t make me like them more; and further to this point many of them, to my knowledge, grew to be abhorrent adults. Or maybe I’m just good at holding a grudge.
Is it possible to say then that some people, whether they are a child or adult, are horrible people from whoa to go?
Whether you’re a kid hating a kid or an adult hating a kid, perhaps it’s due to an inherit personality defect of the target of your hatred. Not a lack of empathy on your own part.